There are other reasons, too, but I'm not going to get into them, as many are deeply personal, and that's not the point of this post.
Whatever it was, a few weeks ago I posted the following status update on Facebook:
It was, to be honest,
kind of a lark. But somehow--in a way and for reasons I don't think I'll ever
fully understand--the idea of "relentless optimism" caught on at my
school. A few colleagues "liked" my status, some mentioned it to me.
. . and I also started talking about relentless optimism, and shouting
"relentless!" when I felt myself getting pulled into negativity. And
then other people did, too.
I accidentally started a
movement.
And as the accidental
leader of this movement, I feel like I should be able to explain what it's
about. So I'm going to try, with the disclaimer that my ideas about relentless
optimism are evolving every day--in ways driven largely by conversations I'm
having with colleagues and friends.
So what is relentless
optimism about?
It's about believing in
(and working for) the possibility of change despite evidence to the contrary.
It's about believing that we're all in this (whatever "this" is)
together. It's about moving forward, even when moving forward is frustrating and
difficult and overwhelming and seemingly pointless because it feels like you've
never gotten anywhere before (or even lost ground).
It's not about being
delusional or ignoring problems. It is so NOT about that. It's easy to just
pretend that everything's fine--easier still to simply complain about what's
wrong and not do anything about it. Relentless optimism is about hope--and hope
makes you vulnerable. It involves the potential of feeling let down--or feeling
like you let someone else down. And that can be scary. But it's better than
feeling stuck.
If you don't try, you are
almost guaranteed to feel disappointed. If you try, and things don't work the
way you wanted them to, you might still feel disappointed, but at least you'll
know you tried. It can be easy--and comfortable--to succumb to negativity and
defeatism. Relentless optimism involves risk; it can mean working without a
net. It might not feel safe, but it's exhilarating.
And it's hard. It's
exhausting. But it's worth it. And surrounding yourself with people who are on
the same page is not just important, it's vital.
Relentless optimism is
about being part of a team and being inspired by colleagues. The work we do is
hard, but it's easier when you know you're not the only one; one of the best
parts of the past few weeks has been when a friend or colleague will (seemingly
randomly but it always seems to come at just the right moment) e-mail me or
text me the word "Relentless!"
It's important to
surround yourself with passionate people; it doesn't even matter if you share
the same passions. Passion, like negativity, is contagious. So surround
yourself with people who inspire you. And if you can't surround yourself with
them (because we all have to deal with people who suck the energy right out of
you), make sure you spend time talking with them, focusing on them, finding out
what they're doing. It sustains you. Well, I know it sustains me.
The work we do is hard,
on every level. It’s harder still if we don’t believe we can make a difference. And feeling like we're all in this
together helps.
It's about, as Plato put it, being kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle. And
don't forget that "everyone" includes you--be kind to yourself.
Indulging in hope is kind to yourself. Surrounding yourself with people who
inspire you is kind to yourself. Taking a night off is kind to yourself, and makes
the rest of life possible. Acknowledging that you're struggling and asking for
help is kind to yourself.
Relentless optimism is
about taking the long view. Even when you feel like you're shouting into the
void, you have no idea when the echoes will bounce back. There are projects and
ideas that I’ve been talking about for what seems like forever, and I was
giving up hope on ever getting traction on them. And now, all of a sudden (but
not really all of a sudden), things are happening. People are responding.
Relationships I’ve been cultivating for years are transforming into partnerships.
It's about not waiting
for someone else to be the leader. No matter our position, we can all be
leaders. There will always be other people and other factors that influence the
direction of your work, but to cede all the decision making to other people is
neither relentless nor optimistic.
Being optimistic (and
being relentless) is a choice. It's not always the easy one. But the more often
and more deliberately I make it, the easier and more powerful it gets. And I
love watching people around me make that choice, too. Relentless optimism does
not happen in a vacuum.
And relentless optimism is about so many other things, too. It's
about whatever it needs to be about for you.
And optimism is, maybe, the wrong word. Maybe it's more about
relentless momentum (which doesn't really have the same ring to it). Forward
motion gives me hope. Acknowledging the struggle is optimistic because it means
you believe that something can be done. Believing in the possibility of change
is the most optimistic thing I can think of. And if you're in education and you
don't believe in the possibility of change, I'd like to kindly ask you to get
out my profession.
And, perhaps most importantly, it's about
yelling "relentless!" at seemingly random moments. As a reminder to
yourself, as a reminder to others, and because it adds a little levity. And
levity is important.
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