Why I needed more than one carryon bag on my trip back

I promise more substantive posts are coming within the next several days (a bad case of dehydration and general exhaustion took me off my stride while I was away). In the meantime, a comprehensive (I think) list of all the swag I came home with:

20 books
11 Pens
8 Totebags
6 T-shirts
4 Test prep DVDs
4 Badge ribbons
3 1/2 Inches of handouts
2 Flashdrives, one of which is also a bracelet (be jealous)
2 Bracelets, one of which is also a flashdrive
2 Squeezeballs (for lack of a better term), one of which is in the shape of a brain
2 Zombies vs. Unicorns buttons (one zombie, one unicorn)
2 non-Zombie vs. Unicorns buttons
2 Miniature computer mice
2 Luggage tags
1 Mini flashlight
1 Noisemaker/Bubbles
1 Mousepad
1 Bandana
1 Foldable cell phone stand
1 Insulated lunch bag
1 12-month subscription to Webspiration
1 Lindt chocolate bar (consumed)